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Challenging the negative thought status-quo

Eric Maganga reading poetry (Photo: Michael Juhl Svendsen)

Eric Maganga reading poetry (Photo: Michael Juhl Svendsen)

"I can see if they have opened my messages. Then it burns if they don’t reply," writes Eric Maganga in his latest blog about the overwhelming feelings and negative thoughts that sometimes come crawling when his friends and relatives are not responding.

Blog |   04. Apr 2018

Eric Maganga

Blogger

I’m thoughtful, I can get trapped in bad habits in terms of feeling unwanted. Sitting in silence not busy enough. Oh, so optimistic – except when I feel rejected by the world. I swing between these thoughts and thinking it is my world. I’ve written I’m winning – I’ve felt I was a champion. Backed into a corner, out of options – how close am I to quitting?

I’ve learned every time I think why do they leave my call unanswered? It’s a sign I have a lot of time to think and perhaps an indication that my self-love isn’t through the roof – if I need their response as proof that I have value as a person. The text and messenger generation and I can see if they have opened my messages. Then it burns if they don’t reply.

Question: How do you handle friends who are unresponsive? Leave a comment.

If you aren’t on the list – they can make you feel small like you don’t exist

Eric Maganga

I even take a traditional form of communication at times – a good old-fashioned call with no answer. But what I’m learning is these are just thoughts – they aren’t always in correlation with reality. It’s all relative and they don’t owe me anything – in their approach if they aren’t my relatives. I can’t play the blame game or question why these friendships transform, and they don’t treat me the same.

Question: Have you ever gotten frustrated with someone who didn’t reply to a message, only to get embarrassed when you hear they had a perfectly good reason? Leave a comment.

It’s a constant battle – internal, the world is how you perceive it. But don’t fool yourself into thinking if you give love you’ll always receive it. This is a key – you’ll always have friends that you designate as favorites. But the thing is, so do they. If you aren’t on the list – they can make you feel small like you don’t exist. But really you do exist, and an unanswered call doesn’t need to mean anything at all – he can reply at any time and render my concerns irrelevant.

Question: Can you stop yourself from feeling that you have no friends?  Leave a comment.

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