And yet these qualities don’t seem to translate to the social world my peers live in. New Year’s is a lonely night and birthdays similarly make me reflect on how I haven’t made connections with any common age contemporaries.

Is that why I’m chasing children and a family life? Because I have learned family will ALWAYS be there.

This is the kind of blog you don’t share on your Facebook page. Even for an emotional exhibitionist like me. Showcasing so much of my heart and soul online I’m exposed and emotionally naked. But if they are reading what I share, they damn sure don’t click like, comment or share.

My friendship life has experienced a Renaissance. Mostly from basketball, some common ground, a topic to talk about. But these friendships get hot quick, microwaved so fast, mean so much to start with, but so seldom do they last.

When you are as real and really quiet as me, you are firmly rooted and live and die by your family tree. I say that to say I’m not an instant gratification kind of friend so either you value me and we become family or the friendship goes by the wayside.

If I should twist it, I could say being quiet, I may not ask friends to meet enough, not open up enough and be prone to take things personally, be mistrusting, selective memory wise and only focus on the friendships that don’t work.

I’m going to twist it. Because I know this at least, I’m on a collision course with success – at best I’ll be a sports journalist connecting with the athletes I interview in the US. The musician’s friend with good professional relationships, I’m winning and you should envy. Instead of spelling my name L-O-N-E-L-Y, I’ll forget all the noise, go to my concerts alone and know I have family.

Listen to Eric Maganga’s blog ” I’m going to the concert alone”, which is read out loud by the acter, Piper McKenzie.