By the time you read this, I will already have completed a very important job interview which I’ve known about since lockdown.
However, even with all that time to prepare, it wasn’t until a couple of days before that I really kicked into gear. I wanted the job. It was everything that I could ever have dreamed of. That being said, try as I might, I couldn’t muster up the motivation to put the work in.
When I think about it, this isn’t the first time I’ve had this problem. Throughout university, come application season for company insight weeks and internships, I made myself busy with social and academic activities, telling myself that I could always send off applications on the weekend. Except I kept putting it off. And putting it off.
Then, by the time I had the nerve to apply, most positions were closed at the big firms and I was lucky to wrangle any work placements at all.
If they couldn’t do it, how could I
Looking back, I know that part of the problem is that I simply didn’t believe in myself. I never thought in a million years that someone like me could make it into a multinational firm, particularly with its long and complex interview processes, so I was too scared to really try.
What’s more, I saw my friends and peers applying for roles and swiftly getting rejected, which made me even more scared to apply. I perceived many of them to be smarter or more employable than me, so if they couldn’t do it, how could I?
Last summer, and throughout my year abroad, those feelings of inadequacy and inferiority to my peers began to change for the better. The more work experience I gained, the more capable I felt, and the more people I met, both at work and during my studies abroad, the more I believed I had something to offer a prospective future employer. However, even still, I was struggling to prepare for this interview.
This time I fully believed that I would make a great addition to the team, but that notion didn’t give me any more motivation to prepare and thus maximize my chances.
Then suddenly it hit me – getting a job meant the end of my days as a care-free student and the start of a new chapter as a young professional woman in industry. Preparing for my interview meant accepting that future – and I’ve been too scared to do so.
Sometimes I worry that the working world will be the death of all of that – the death of my youth
I have loved being a student – both the responsibility and irresponsibility, the people I’ve met and the memories I’ve made. Sometimes I worry that the working world will be the death of all of that – the death of my youth.
But of course, that’s not all true. Even writing those words made me realise I’m being a bit overdramatic. Naturally, full-time study and full-time work have their differences, but both have the same number of pros and cons too.
With work comes financial independence and the ability to, one day, have a whole home of your own and not just a room in a small, shared flat with budget IKEA furniture. Or the fact that it allows you to use your own set of skills to make your mark on the world, working in a position that is all yours to shape however you see fit.
Maybe you know what I’m talking about. Maybe you think that big firms like Mærsk or Novo Nordisk are way out of your league, or you don’t like the idea that one day, you won’t be a student anymore. Or maybe there’s a completely different reason why you can’t bring yourself to look for the job you know you need, or hit ‘send’ on an application you’ve just spent ages crafting.
Whatever it is, you’re not alone. But remember this – you have absolutely nothing to lose from trying, but there are no limits to what you could gain. The hardest part of any journey is starting. After that, all the pieces will fall into place.
I finally faced my fears and I definitely don’t regret it – will you join me?